Skip to main content

Conundrums and Impact

This is not the post I planned to publish this month. My intent for this post was to discuss rurality and its impact on Fort Smith teachers (I promise, there is an impact). But, it can wait until next month. Instead, let's chat about uncomfortable and awkward professional moments. 

A couple of months ago, I interviewed for a local, rural high school principal position. I was stoked about the opportunity, so I Showed Up for the interview! To prepare, I studied the population, the community traditions, the instructional strengths and weaknesses, and how the school leadership communicated with the external community. I even familiarized myself with local organizations interconnected with the school community. It was absolutely the best interview I have ever had. I actually drove away, terrified that I may be selected as the instructional leader of a high school when I have absolutely no high school experience.  

Fast forward to May 18 and an invitation to interview for a middle school assistant principal position in my district. The district I have served for 12 years and in which leaders have immersed me in opportunity. I prepared just as vehemently as I prepared for the previous interview. However, I did not hit a home run. 

I awoke the morning of the interview and followed my daily routine- doctoral coursework, exercise, then pamper and primp for work. Everything was going smoothly..... until it wasn't (I'll save that story for another time). From the start of the interview, I felt I was navigating an unknown arena, attempting to speak a strange language. Make no mistake. I am well-versed in the language, and the arena is familiar, but my mind was blank during those moments. I was on a metaphorical stage surrounded by the district leaders with whom I felt great comfort. I serve on the Guiding Coalition with them and feel no trepidation or intimidation in their presence. Regardless, my audition for building leadership was a flop, to put it kindly.

As I drove away, I reflected on the experience. Emotions of defeat and embarrassment coursed through me. I felt as though I had disappointed the group by whom I was interviewed, not to mention my extraordinary mentors who spent years preparing me for that moment. I compared the two interview experiences wondering why the first was such a positive experience while the next was disastrous. 

The comparison led me to three profound realizations. First, I need to embrace the value of my current professional capacity. Second, I did not really believe the rural district would select me as their high school principal. I have no experience as a building administrator. Third, I do not want to be a building administrator. Because of this awareness, I may never climb the administrative ladder in an educational realm. But it's ok. I am giving myself permission to refrain from stair-stepping the inclining rungs of the proverbial ladder. It's ok because I will positively impact people and organizations regardless of what I do. 

Having a positive impact is a mighty fine legacy. I can live with that. 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

WHIRLWIND

I have not had time to stop and breathe!  My classroom is a mess, I have no idea what I'm doing from day to day....but somehow, I have gained the trust of 54 fourth graders, and although it is still an adjustment, I am watching them grow individually, emotionally, and academically. There is nothing more amazing than watching that light come on.  When I see my kids carrying their heads high because they are PROUD of the content and strategies that they have learned, the late nights and lack of weekends is worth it.  I am grateful for my students, I am grateful for the support that I have from my co teachers, and I am grateful for surviving the first two weeks in my first year of being a fourth grade teacher! 

Back to School!

Well, Thanksgiving break is over.  My kids came back ready for another break and not wanting to focus.  And.....we have TLI testing next week.  This will be the first one that is a reflection of how well I taught the skills.  I am so nervous.  Although I have seen growth in myself instruction wise as well as classroom management wise, I still have so far to go before I will be effective.  I just hope that I am doing right by these children.  They deserve the best teacher and role model they can get, and I am striving to be just that. 

Teaching Ideas

Although I don't have my own classroom yet, I will be substitute teaching in grades K-12.  I would love for you all to share your teaching strategies and activities that you have done in your classrooms.